Sweaty Qiyyam

May the Peace, Love and Blessings of Allah be with you

It’s the 27th night of Ramadan and finally for the first time in this beautiful month I step inside the Masjid.

It has been a month of one child after the other coming down with a flu that wiped them out for a week and finally, I got it too!

“What a terrible way to spend Ramadan”  you may be thinking. But it hasn’t been, and I’ll tell you why in a moment.

So at 3am we walk in the brisk (actually really cold) night air to the Masjid. It’s only 5 minutes up the street. So it seems really strange that we haven’t set foot inside the Masjid to join the community spirit of Ramadan. As we ascend the stairs it is clear that the sisters area is packed. The sisters actually outgrew the space 3 years ago and as the community has grown, sisters have precariously prayed on the stairs in order to join the congregation.

We squeeze our way in and are hit by the stifling heat and the “packed like sardine” state of the rows of sisters. With my back to the back wall I joined the prayer. Back and forth kids walk in front of our row trying to get in and out. Being tall I had to find space between sisters feet to put my head in Sujud. The space was scattered with the elderly and pregnant in chairs making the rows awkward. Bundles of sleeping children in quilts spread across nearly a quarter of the limited space. Not to mention the bags and bedding mountain up the back that we were praying amongst.

It could have been a time when I regretted leaving the comfort of my home to pray.

I could have stood there and stewed over how crazy and impractical the way everyone set it up. I certainly have done that in the past.

Instead I stood there, with my tired body, sweat dripping down my back from the oppressive heat in a state of inner peace and gratitude. I didn’t understand the words of the Qu’ran but they flowed over my body and through my soul like a warm gentle hug. I felt light and peaceful. The time drifted away with ease until we were standing for the final Rakah of Witr prayer.

I hadn’t noticed any of the disturbances. Even the crying child who banged his head on the door didn’t distract me from my peaceful state.

I was able to truly spend that time connecting with Allah. Alhumdu Lillah.

So do I regret not having more time at the Masjid this Ramadan to feel this dreamy, in love with worshipping Allah feeling?


I can have moments like that anywhere at anytime. I don’t have to be at the Masjid to feel close to Allah. Our experience and feelings come from thought in the moment. We can attend the prayer in congregation at the Masjid and feel fidgety, have a busy mind wandering all over the place and not “feel” at all connected to Allah. We can also be at home and have a really strong connection to Allah. Our connection to Allah is there all the time, it’s just sometimes we can’t see it. It isn’t dependant on where we are at the time.

I have had many times when I have felt that beautiful connection with Allah this Ramadan despite the fact that I have mostly been housebound with a sick family! In fact it has been a very insightful and life changing month for me.

So this is where I want to challenge the sisters, in a good way, in sha Allah.

You don’t need to be at the Masjid to feel closer to Allah. You don’t have to drag young children out into the cold night so that you can get rewarded by Allah for worshipping him. It is our own thinking that has made us believe that we can’t have that truly blissful feeling at home, that the only way is to goto the Masjid. And on top of that, we have so much opportunity to worship Allah by having Ihsan (excellence) in our parenting our children. In sha Allah.

I invite you to watch the free video training that I have put together this Ramadan that will show you exactly how you can make parenting your children an act of worship in sha Allah. Here is the link to see it http://ParentingForParadise.com

And to all the brothers who are reading this ….
…. It was lovely to be a part of the community, to feel like part of the Ummah. You too can get reward by caring for your children and allowing your wife to have a chance to go to the Masjid without all the children with her. Or perhaps you can have them with you in the brothers area? Just as the Prophet SAW did with his grandsons? Sisters need to be part of the community too, it’s not healthy for them to be isolated at home with the children all the time. So perhaps you might like to learn more about turning your parenting into an act of worship too. Here is the link http://ParentingForParadise.com

It’s OK if you disagree. We can agree to disagree.
May Allah accept your good deeds, your fasting and your Dua this month.

  • Narriman says:

    Jazakallah Khairun, sister Subhanallah. Allahu Akbar. I too have been tending to my sick family and have now taken ill as well to the extent that I am not observing fast today. I have been feeling very disappointed because tonight is the 27th night and was really looking forward to attending the masjied tonight. However, yet again the proof that Allah SWT is in charge Algamdullilah for your blog. May Allah SWT bless you and your family abundantly and accept all your duahs and good deeds InshaaAllah

  • Melissa Lucas says:

    Assalamu alaikum sister. What a beautiful piece I have just read.
    I have not been to the masjid this ramadan but I have had many times being in the comfort of my home and feeling truelly connected to Allah. I agree that we dont need to be in a masjid and drag our children in the cold to be able to connect with Allah. We can have that connection anywhere and anytime. May Allah SWT reward all my sisters and brothers in Islam and accept our sawm and duas. Ameen

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